HOW WE SABOTAGE OUR SUCCESS
Most people don't intentionally mess up their lives but they feel powerless to stop it. I used to be my own worst enemy, but I didn't know it and even when I did know I was doing it, I didn't know how to stop it.
I knew that as soon as things were flowing along comfortably in my life, I would get nervous. I couldn't imagine that things were just going to be okay. It made me feel uncomfortable! Somehow I would do something that would throw a wrench into my life situation and cause upset. I didn't do it on purpose, but it just felt uncomfortable to not have intensity going on. I lived in a perpetual state of chaos and it felt uncomfortable or unusual to have it be calm and peaceful. Too much happiness or good things was not something I was comfortable with.
People that have never experienced these kinds of problems probably have a hard time understanding how people could need to have problems to be comfortable!
When we grow up in a constant state of lack of some sort, we get used to that feeling, so when we have some abundance of goodness or success it can feel uncomfortable. If we aren't aware of this we will do something to cause lack again so we will feel more normal, or what feels more normal to us. There are many negative things in peoples lives, and when they get so used to feeling that way they will create it again.
If we are used to failing it is very hard to let ourselves succeed.
We have grooves in our brains that are our defaults. We need to change those default grooves so we can make new grooves. We need success grooves instead of failure grooves. Acceptance grooves instead of rejection grooves. Instead of relapsing back into lack thinking we need to change our thinking processess.
We need to become aware of our discomfort at succeeding or being accepted, and let ourselves feel the uncomfortable feeling. Then we need to change our thinking about it. Instead of allowing ourselves to think thoughts of powerlessness at these problems, we need to change what we say to ourselves about them. For example, "It is okay if I am a success!" I can succeed! "It is okay to receive love." "It is okay if I am accepted." I can be accepted! "It is okay if I succeed." I don't need to create rejection. "It is okay if I am accepted." "I deserve to be accepted." "It is okay if I succeed!"
Then we need to let ourselves feel uncomfortable for a while. Feeling uncomfortable is not something that will kill us. It will feel uncomfortable because we are not used to succeeding or being accepted or loved, but changing our thinking and not being afraid of uncomfortable feelings will help us make new grooves in our brains and create new futures for ourselves.
Instead of always trying to climb out of a hole that we have dug for ourselves over and over again, we will get used to doing well. We will not need to create any kind of intensity to feel okay in our lives. I know this works because I am living proof that a person can go from a rejected spirit of lack to one of fullness of spirit and life!
I knew that as soon as things were flowing along comfortably in my life, I would get nervous. I couldn't imagine that things were just going to be okay. It made me feel uncomfortable! Somehow I would do something that would throw a wrench into my life situation and cause upset. I didn't do it on purpose, but it just felt uncomfortable to not have intensity going on. I lived in a perpetual state of chaos and it felt uncomfortable or unusual to have it be calm and peaceful. Too much happiness or good things was not something I was comfortable with.
People that have never experienced these kinds of problems probably have a hard time understanding how people could need to have problems to be comfortable!
When we grow up in a constant state of lack of some sort, we get used to that feeling, so when we have some abundance of goodness or success it can feel uncomfortable. If we aren't aware of this we will do something to cause lack again so we will feel more normal, or what feels more normal to us. There are many negative things in peoples lives, and when they get so used to feeling that way they will create it again.
If we are used to failing it is very hard to let ourselves succeed.
We have grooves in our brains that are our defaults. We need to change those default grooves so we can make new grooves. We need success grooves instead of failure grooves. Acceptance grooves instead of rejection grooves. Instead of relapsing back into lack thinking we need to change our thinking processess.
We need to become aware of our discomfort at succeeding or being accepted, and let ourselves feel the uncomfortable feeling. Then we need to change our thinking about it. Instead of allowing ourselves to think thoughts of powerlessness at these problems, we need to change what we say to ourselves about them. For example, "It is okay if I am a success!" I can succeed! "It is okay to receive love." "It is okay if I am accepted." I can be accepted! "It is okay if I succeed." I don't need to create rejection. "It is okay if I am accepted." "I deserve to be accepted." "It is okay if I succeed!"
Then we need to let ourselves feel uncomfortable for a while. Feeling uncomfortable is not something that will kill us. It will feel uncomfortable because we are not used to succeeding or being accepted or loved, but changing our thinking and not being afraid of uncomfortable feelings will help us make new grooves in our brains and create new futures for ourselves.
Instead of always trying to climb out of a hole that we have dug for ourselves over and over again, we will get used to doing well. We will not need to create any kind of intensity to feel okay in our lives. I know this works because I am living proof that a person can go from a rejected spirit of lack to one of fullness of spirit and life!
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